Two Weeks Postpartum.
On Sunday August 29th at 5:04 in the morning, our son, Rowan Harding, came into the world and made me a mom. Rowan’s earth side journey started unexpectedly and excitingly, and I’m in disbelief that he’s already been here for almost three weeks. Time basically no longer exists; the moments seem so slow, yet each day passes so quickly, for perspective for you, I originally started writing this post at the two week mark and here we are six days later, sharing a glimpse of our life postpartum and my journey into motherhood.
Everything they say is true. Becoming a parent is the most overwhelming feeling in the world, no matter how much people try to explain to you the amount of love you feel for this little human being, it can’t accurately be put into words. Becoming a parent is also very hard, taking care of a newborn is tough, it’s not just the sleep deprivation or the stretches of trying to figure out what they need in a cycle of feeding to changing diapers. It’s navigating trying to make the best decision for them, your body recovering from labor and delivery, the emotional roller coaster you’re on both rational and irrational (I took a shower the night we came home from the hospital, and bawled my eyes out; the last time I had showered I was pregnant, I was overcome with a sense of loss of missing being pregnant, I didn’t even think I enjoyed it that much!), navigating each day as a totally new person, one now identified as mom. But then they wrap their hand around your finger, or that first involuntary smile shines up at you, or you feel their weight sink in on your chest as they fall into a deep sleep, it’s all worth it. It’s all so perfect, you think you never need to sleep another moment in your life.
After a few solid days of Andrew and I periodically finding one another to embrace and cry tears of joy, we’ve since spent our days not really paying attention to the time of day - soaking in endless snuggles as a family, and trying to get lots of fresh air, while attempting to nap as much as possible. So far, Rowan has napped through every walk we’ve taken, but I’m sure he’ll come to appreciate nature soon enough. We tried to keep all of our baby supplies minimal and essential, and to be fair the little guy doesn’t need much, but a few things that we have loved having on hand are our SNOO, Snuggle Me Organic Lounger (transportable place for baby to lay his head), Ergobaby Newborn Insert, and while regular pillows would suffice, have loved having a Boppy Pillow for breast feeding. After reading the Happiest Baby on the Block and getting a pretty rave review about the SNOO from my brother and his wife who have five month old twins, at the last minute we decided to just go for it and upgrade our bassinet. GAME CHANGER, we honestly don’t even put Rowan in it that much for naps during the day, but as first time parents the best thing about it was the peace of mind that came from having him strapped in and secure while sleeping, outside of the added bonus it puts him to sleep so quickly and easily calms him when he becomes fussy. If you’re planning to invest more in some product for your baby, this is where I would recommend putting those resources, outside of a fancy stroller or an extensive wardrobe of clothes.
I am endlessly grateful that I have a husband who has not only been able to be home on leave with me, but has kept our house in order, cooked three meals for us most days and is just overall so hands on with our little boy. While I’ve always given all mothers a lot of credit, even bigger shoutouts to all of you moms and dads out there, parents raising kids, those who don’t get leave from work, who’s partners also don’t get leave, who don’t have support, or resources or any help lightening the load. You are all crushing it, you’re superheroes.
Time is funny in a lot of ways, once again in taking almost a week to get this recap out, my whole reason for wanting to share has changed. What started as an effort or maybe a need to find some catharsis I was going to dive into my postpartum struggles, how I’m having trouble in unexpected ways with my body’s recovery, like developing severe PUPPP three days after Rowan was born. But last night, during a middle of the night feeding I came across a woman’s Instagram post and her progress report of getting to hold her newborn son for the first time, 17 days after a premature birth. Her child has been battling in the nicu for almost three weeks, and I’ve got to snuggle my son every single day for three weeks. While my journey is different and my feelings are valid, I can continue to handle any sort of grace I need to give myself and my body, because none of that matters as much as knowing Rowan is breathing, and eating and growing as a healthy baby safe at home.
Outside of that I will say there were a few products that did make my postpartum recovery much more comfortable. My best friend gave birth to a baby girl just a few months ago and gave me the sweetest care package of Frida Mom goodies to help me through the weeks after birth; I didn’t even know these types of products existed but they made a huge difference in pain management and comfort. They have all kinds of labor and recovery products but the ones I used and would recommend are the Disposable Underwear (don’t have to think about regular underwear or waistbands and way more durable than hospital grade disposables), Witch Hazel Cooling Pad Liners (soothing and also hygiene) and the Instant Ice Maxi Pads (cause well, no brainer).
Every day brings new excitement and new challenges, but I’ve never been more sure that I was meant to be Rowan’s mama. One day this space may begin to focus more on fashion and style again, but for now, I invite you to come along this journey further into motherhood with me, I’m so excited to see where it leads.
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